Saturday, September 25, 2010

Being Nice Is Hard Work


I survived another week among the long-knives. A full week of penance where I recited a thousand times "how's the family" and a hundred "have a good weekend's". I find it a lot of work and it's time consuming when someone actually takes it seriously and replies with more than the one word answer I'm expecting.

Another challenge is that I have an expressive face; especially when it comes to disgust. Botox is expensive and it only gives you Pelosi-Face for a couple of months. I'm thinking about taking a dopaminergic blocking drug like Reglan. This way I can walk around all day with a mask-face typical of an eighty year old Parkinson's patient.

I also need to expand my repertoire of concern quips. I've thought up some new ones:

Do you think it's time to bring the plants in for the winter?
What did you do this weekend?
How about those Dolphins?

Everyday I go to my Higher-Power, my Source, the one and only Fred Rogers.

4 comments:

M- said...

No, Babba. Bad choices for concern. Each of those questions begs a conversation. No, Babba. Bad.

Try: "Happy Monday" (or) "enjoy your day" (or) "the soup is good today" Much safer.

D- said...

Ahh...soaring with Eagles is tough when you work with a bunch of Turkeys. Even Fred Rogers had to appeal to the HIGHER POWER.
Gotta sing the "all day song" to yourself before you go to work.

Marianne said...

omg, Dad, TOO funny. I agree with Aunt Mary: those are conversation OPENERS, not closers. I prefer really bizarre responses that don't seem to follow from what the person said. Just say something out-of-the-blue, as though you didn't hear anything they said correctly. It works for me. They leave rather than try to recap their inane conversation.

Anonymous said...

babba, i love you just the way u are... i don't care if you ask about my weekend... usually sucks anyway, and all my plants die anyway, even my grass , so i stopped buying them... and the dolphins?? i didn't go to sea world this weekend...
so you just stop worrying... you are great just as you are... don't change..
maybe you should have the same people listen to your life... and really give them an ear full .. ask if they will take their lunch break to discuss how you can get bo to do a new trick or something ??? love you...

b....