Are you wondering why Lady Caroline didn't get the New York Senate seat? Let me tell you: it wasn't because of an illegal (sorry, undocumented) nanny, it wasn't that pesky unpaid income tax, it wasn't that she has a sham marriage or the fact that the hardest day's work she ever did was sweeping the sand off her front porch in the Hamptons. The real problem was she couldn't relate to the common clay that is rural upstate New York. Outside the area between 34th and 79th streets (also known as midtown Manhattan) is a whole other world as foreign to her as the lunar landscape. Don't expect to see her at the "4 cylinder 400" in Bovina, N.Y.