Friday, June 17, 2011
And If I Was An Oscar-Meyer Weiner Everyone Would Be In Love With Me
We need to keep New York around just for comic relief. I have made a few mistaken calls with my cell phone, but usually it's a picture of my seat belt buckle. In fact in the early days of cell phones I would usually make a few inadvertent calls a day. My children would affectionately refer to these dead calls and text photos of the Toyota's stick shift as "Dad's Ass Calls." One time I even dialed 911 while trying to retrieve a quarter at the drive-up window. However, it seems like the whole 4-G network has conspired to entrap one N.Y. congressman with the unfortunate name of Weiner.
The amazing thing is that although crooks, perverts, philanderers and reprobates have always existed, now they think they can just continue to hold public office once they're caught. Whatever happened to the honorable thing: commit "Sepaku", or at least resign and dedicate the next few years of your life to authentic public service. Today we are expected to accept a 4-G flasher (minus the raincoat) as representative of the people. What happened to the ho-hum affair with the secretary or night with a call-girl? Now we have to endure all this weird crap that would even make a Kennedy blush.
Weiner didn't care about his wife, his constituents, his party or the women he flashed. It was all about him saving his career. The same selfish, narcisistic ego that drives these elites prevents them from seeing the damage they cause. Whether it's John Edwards, Jimmy Swaggart or Bill Clinton, it's all about them.
When I worked in a small town in West Virginia there was a fellow who worked in a large national brand poultry plant. Now this guy was caught on camera having connubial relations with the turkeys. Unlike an elected official he was fired. The story was reported in the local paper (they printed his name and address) and the jokes came hot and heavy. Every trash can in town contained a turkey, and even some chickens were implicated by association. One day at work someone pointed the perp out to me. I thought to myself, how can this guy stay in this town of 2,000 people? Maybe he missed his calling, he should have run for the County Commission. Down here in S.C. we had a guy arrested twice for his relationship with his neighbor's horse. They didn't even have a law on the books to deal with it. I think it was plea-bargained down to animal cruelty. What can I say, after Bill Clinton the country lost all sense of shame.