Saturday, January 15, 2011


Let's see. It snowed eight inches Sunday night and school is closed till the following Tuesday. No church last Sunday morning because it's supposed to start snowing at eleven PM that evening. The weather people, that bunch of morons. feel the need to remind us every ten minutes: "no school buses running on icy roads." They should add to that list, snow plows, police cars , ambulances, and tow trucks. You can't get a tow truck to get you out of a ditch if the snow on your street is more than six inches deep.

So far this year the schools have been closed twenty days for wind, rain, cold, threat of rain, threat of cold and threat of snow anywhere east of the Mississippi River. Do you wonder why India and China are kicking our butts? Those people will pedal a bicycle up a mountain in a monsoon to get to their three dollar a day job. It just shows how helpless we have become. I actually think driving in the snow is fun; except for watching out for the dummies who don't know how.

I heard on the radio that the local businesses do well in the snow. It seems that all the snow-weenies who can't get to work or school find some way to make it to the mall. All it takes is eight inches of blowing snow to force us all into our caves like a bunch of neanderthals. Instead of sitting around the fire or drawing cave paintings we sit in front of the TV or immersed in some 4G network describing our last bowel movement. Eventually the cave-man has to go out in the snow and throw sticks at a Woolly Mammoth. They probably perished because some cave-man bureaucrat wrote on the cave wall "No Cave-Men On Icy Roads".

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