Too bad I didn't fly into Charlotte five days later. I would have enjoyed this. The reason U.S. Airlines pilots carry guns is they are afraid of the pissed-off passengers. I'm sure with a little Silly-Putty and Duct-Tape they will have that Air-Bus back in service in an hour. If I had a gun I'd have shot the toilet, then maybe it would drain and not stink up the plane.
This is a guarantee I found in my new The Message Bible. I find a lifetime guarantee in a Bible troubling. It should come with an eternal guarantee. "If after reading this Bible you are not born again please return the unread portion to God". I wish I could return it because I don't like the translation. I knew it was kind of an Amplified, Good News, Paraphrased translation. I owned the previous three and liked each one better than my Message bible. I traded my New American Standard for an NIV when it came out about 30 years ago. The NIV, while being the most accurate and precise translation isn't the most literary. The Message Bible is anemic. My favorite verses are not recognizable and some verses seem to just disappear. After about 500 pages of both Old and New Testaments I really think it is lacking. I'll look into the RSV and NAS in the future. There is always the Catholic Bible; I hear it has a few extra books. My translator recommended the Gnostic Bible. She told me it contained a few extra gospels. It even had a gospel written by John the Baptist. I always wondered what Jesus was up to during his formative years. This is just my scholarly
observation. I prefer my Bible not be a puff-piece.