I'm turning into Raymond Barone

I forgot to tell the story of our getaway from Pahrump. In the mornings while my sister was taking care of the horses CP and I went out to breakfast. On Sunday we went out to Terrible Herbst Casino and had breakfast for two for $ 7.50. Then my sister told us about a new diner about a half mile from the ranch. On Mon. we went there and it was really nice. Breakfast cost $15.00 but there wasn't that casino smell. I look at the sign on the door and it says open 6 am.

CP told my sister we would see her in the morning and we left them passed out in the den after the clam-bake. Now I wake up @ 5:30 am and start my usual evacuation plan. CP says "we can't just sneak out like a bunch of gypsies", but I want that great breakfast before the 80 mile trip to the airport. So we sneak out which isn't easy because my sisters million dollar house has a burglar alarm system that chimes when you open the front door. Now the doors are never locked and all the keys are in the vehicles but the alarm came with the house and I don't think they know how to turn it off. After the rough night before I can't see waking them up. We sneak out. Carol is protesting as I pull away into the blackness that is always blackest in Area-51. I'm thinking about my plan again, so I say "We will go back to the house after breakfast". In two minutes we are at the diner. I check my watch, it's 6:15. CP says "It's dark in there" and I reply that there is a pick-up out front. I get out seeing visions of bacon n eggs and hot coffee. When I get to the door I see the guy inside scraping the 6 a.m. sign off the glass door. He opens the door a crack and mumbles "7 o'clock." By now CP is giving me looks that say "you idiot".

So I jump back in the car and speed back to the house. CP is harping at me "OK Mr. Class-Act what are you going to tell your sister". Now I know the chime went off when we left so I'm thinking maybe they are up. I walk in, my sister is sitting on the edge of the couch in her robe, half asleep. She says, "Where were you guys?" I'm thinking fast and then I just blurt out, "We were putting the stuff in the car." My sister says "I'll make coffee and there's bagels in the cupboard". CP is giving me the Debra Barone look. I'm trying to keep a straight face and not burst out laughing. I settle for the Ralphie look from A Christmas Story.